In Pastor Rob’s words, “Fire tornadoes are real.”
It is astonishing how much can change from one Sunday to the next. What started as a raging fire tornado transformed into a deep, unexpected peace and a sense of renewed purpose. Through it all, God showed up in ways only He could. There was no doubt who is and always will be in control. Amid these changes, He reminded me that my loved ones are not my adversaries. He provided a prayer that soothed my mind and realigned my spirit. Here is a line from that prayer by Soulful words: “I pray, Lord, that You would actively shield my mental health from the enemy’s relentless attacks, and stand guard over my mind with Your perfect peace.”
Throughout the week, God revealed coping strategies I had used for decades against the tornado of addiction. Like a tornado, addiction took everything and left nothing but wreckage. My addictions, which are mainly behaviors and compulsions, placed great distance between me and God’s unconditional love. I found myself searching for love and acceptance in all the wrong people. I idolized my relationships, putting in tremendous effort and making misguided attempts to be helpful. Truly, I believed I was offering help and support. Instead, I was exhausting myself by manipulating people, things and circumstances to meet my emotional needs and feed my heart and soul. When these efforts failed, I looked elsewhere to escape and numb the pain of what I perceived as rejection. In the past, I placed my worth in my possessions, hoping to find fulfillment, satisfaction and contentment.
Building on these realizations, this year I am learning to live in the moment as a gift. I especially treasure Saturdays, set aside to spend more time with God—worshiping through creativity, praying over my latest creation, and listening to podcasts. In those moments, I recognize the Lord’s nearness. His presence strengthens and humbles me, breaking my ego, expectations, and sense of entitlement.
One Saturday was extraordinary. I camped out in the book of Isaiah and tuned in to Heartstrong, where I had the privilege of becoming more Christ-like as I heard insights and wisdom from the fabulous four: Pastors Barry, Joyce, Lori, and Jason. It was amazing, and I experienced a breakthrough!
That experience deepened my understanding. God connected the dots between my life and His Word, weaving hope and unshakeable and unbreakable faith into my journey. Through my craft, heart, and relationships, He shows me that friction, tension, and pressing are significant things He uses to shape me for His greater purpose.
Friction between fabric layers affects the smoothness of my craft. Similarly, friction in relationships affects my attitude, feelings, and heart posture, leading to resentment, which is as poisonous as anger.
In sewing, tension is the balance between the needle thread and the bobbin thread. It determines how tightly they pull together to form a stitch. Proper tension results in balanced stitches with hidden knots. Unbalanced tension can cause problems such as looping (too loose), puckering (too tight), or uneven thread placement. This ultimately compromises seam quality and strength.
In the Bible, tension denotes the coexistence of seemingly opposing yet equally valid principles, such as God’s sovereignty and my will. It also encompasses the emotional strain associated with faith—such as anxiety, anticipation, and struggle—which, while challenging, can lead to personal growth. Spiritual tension serves a transformative purpose in my life.
Tension in a relationship can be positive or negative, depending on the emotional or mental strain arising from conflicting needs, expectations, or unresolved issues, and it can signal change. It can have negative effects, such as friction and distance, or positive effects, promoting growth and deeper connections. Effective awareness is essential for maintaining healthy relationships. And this new awareness is the gift God gave me between two Sundays.
Moving an iron back and forth on fabric can sometimes create new wrinkles or pull the seams, making it harder to achieve a smooth appearance. But pressing with lift, pressure and heat achieves the desired results. Heat, although uncomfortable, refines my character – this controlled burn minimizes the risk of tornadoes and chaos in my relationships. In the pressing, whether it be ironing, pressing grapes or olives, or perseverance through adversity, things turn out as they were meant to be – not as I perceived them to be! Not perfect, but ready to serve their purpose.
So now that I have this new awareness and I am ready to serve my purpose, in this season and the next, what am I going to do about it?
I will choose to set and respect boundaries in relationships rather than being all-in or all-out. I will choose to accept tension in my relationships without dwelling on unhealthy emotions. And most importantly, I will choose to delight in the Lord rather than people, places, and possessions.
Finally, after decades of claiming Psalm 37:4 as my life verse-“Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart”-I am ready to be intentional about fixing my eyes on Jesus, seeking God first, and allowing the Holy Spirit to course-correct as needed. God is faithful!
I shall no more be termed Forsaken, and my land shall no more be termed Desolate, but I shall be called My Delight Is in Her; for the LORD delights in me (Isaiah 64:2). With this assurance, I step boldly into the future, ready to serve my purpose with faith and confidence.
