“Not even the highest places or the lowest, or anything else in all creation can separate us. Nothing at all can ever separate us from God’s love. That’s because of what Christ Jesus our Lord has done.” Romans 8:39 NIRV
“The Lord himself will go ahead of you. He will be with you. He will never leave you. He will never desert you. So don’t be afraid. Don’t lose hope.” Deut. 31:8 NIRV
Who is God? What a big question. We can learn about who God is as an idea or concept, but maybe we would find ourselves with more questions: God, where are You, or where have You been? Why is there so much suffering and pain? I don’t know if any answer to these questions will be sufficient, but maybe we can feel closer to Him by understanding ourselves and God more.
I didn’t realize how much my early experiences with caregivers shaped my view of God until I started walking through my healing process. I went through experiences in my life that left me feeling like I was alone and unloved. A great mentor and friend reminded me one day, a day when I was feeling so confused and hopeless, that the one thing that helped her in the darkest days of her grief was to focus on the character of God. This sent me on a journey to really look at who God is and who is He to me?
I learned that God is our Father, and He is loving. It is also only natural that we would make sense of this relationship with God through our early experiences with caregivers in our lives. We learn who God is by both implicit and explicit knowledge. Explicit beliefs are the ones we consciously know we believe and can articulate through cognitive processes. Implicit knowledge is more unconscious attitudes, beliefs and biases, ones that are more experienced and emotional. Both are parts of us all, and both are ways of knowing. Implicit knowledge is first shaped by early experiences and how we made sense of those relationships. Therefore, it influences how we are with others, including God.
Neff and McMinn share that talking and writing about God’s character is a good template to shape how we want to live that forms our concept of God. Our backgrounds, worldviews, and relational history shape our image of God. God has His image of how creation is; this is the Imago Dei, humans made in God’s image (see Genesis 1:26-27). God’s image of us is overwhelmingly positive, while our perception is often complex and full of mixed thoughts and feelings. A connection happens when we experience God’s image, a knowing beyond our concept and thoughts.
The truth (whether I believe it or not) is that God is always with us. He is good and created us in His image. He is unconditionally loving and so much more. It was hard for me to trust this truth because my experience with close loved ones was something that did not match what was described.
God did not promise we won’t experience pain and suffering in our lives, (we know this even if we wish it were different), but He did say He will never leave us nor forsake us and that nothing can separate us from Him. Maybe you are walking through some deep pain or suffering right now, and it doesn’t feel like God is there. This could feel true because your caregivers were not there, or circumstances left you physically or emotionally alone. But the fact that you are even acknowledging the pain or suffering means He has more for you and wants you to heal. Choosing to walk with God is BOLD and COURAGEOUS. It might be the hardest thing you will ever do, but you will come to know His love so honestly and purely for yourself. Journeying into a relationship with God will lead you to know implicitly that you are GOOD and you are LOVED because you are made in His image, and you will NEVER be alone.
